Do you ever find yourself smoking, wondering why you even do it anymore? Like you’re chasing something that faded a long time ago?

That was where Jeannie found herself. She clung to smoking long after it had lost its luster. But until she realized the habit was directly tied to her self-esteem, she struggled to walk away.

Everything changed when she began looking inward, following the guidance of her body and emotions to finally leave smoking behind for good. Enjoy Jeannie’s story here on You Can Quit Smoking.

Jessi:

Hey everyone, welcome back. I'm here today with Jeannie. So excited to talk with her. Sounds like she's been through it. I'm really inspired by her and her podcast.

Thank you so much for being here Jeannie. Can you introduce yourself to the audience?


Jeannie:

Thank you so much for having me on. My name is Jeannie McIntyre and I host a podcast called Growing Up Late amongst other things in my life.

I'm just really glad to be here and have a conversation with you today.


Jessi:

Thank you. I'm excited to talk with you. I want to know more about your story with smoking. What's your story with smoking?


Jeannie:

I took a look back at my smoking history and I don't know. In retrospect, it's very kind of sad and pathetic, right?

I think I began smoking because the cool kids were doing it and so I joined in. And it didn't make me cool. It definitely didn't give me what it was that I thought it would give me. It put me in a very specific group of friends though that wasn't necessarily a group of people that I would have selected otherwise.

I'll tell you what I know now. For the period of my life that I smoked, smoking was making a lot of decisions for me that I didn't have a say in where I went, what I did, who I was with.


Jessi:

So, you started noticing that right away then?


Jeannie:

Yes.


Jessi:

How young were you?


Jeannie:

I think I was about 14, 15 years old. I added it up and I smoked about 30 years. A long time.

And I quit three times for various reasons. I remember I just quit one time because I knew it was not cool, not helping. There was no good coming from it. I kind of caught on to the whole it was making some decisions for me that I wouldn't make.

Plus, I worked for some folks, none of whom smoked. It was very inconvenient. I traveled a lot. I flew. So going through airports, trying to find a place to smoke, it just was ruling my life a lot. And so I quit once by the patch and I think it stuck for a year.

And then I think I took Chantix one time and quit not very long at all. And I didn't have a great reaction to that. So, pretty unsuccessful. I really feel like at the end of the day, you have to kind of hit a rock bottom with what you're doing.

And I can remember very clearly, I was walking up a flight of stairs. I had a cold. I got out of breath. I had to stop and brace myself on a wall. Mind you, this was in 2012, so a long time, 14 years ago.

And even then, I mean, I was leaning against the wall and thinking, "This is ridiculous. If I keep going like this, it's really going to ruin my health." That moment planted the seed of, “I've got to figure this out. I've got to find a new way to quit.”

And of course, it didn't help that my husband smoked. And I remember we quit together one time. But it would always be the thing of, “Let's just buy a pack and have one.” Like, I have no idea. Once in a while we'd buy a pack and smoke a cigarette and throw it away. But usually it was like, "Well, that'd be a waste, so we'd just keep going."


Jessi:

That voice comes in your head and like you said, can start making decisions for you. Yeah, it sounds really scary with that time walking up the stairs. How did you feel in that moment? Were you panicked or just had more clarity like, “This is enough”?


Jeannie:

I really think in that moment I panicked. Of course, when the cold passed, it faded. But in that moment I was kind of gripped with, “This is going to kill me” kind of a moment.

My husband's family, his parents smoked. No one in my family smoked. My mother was pretty allergic to it. So, she would just smell it on me and be bothered. But we hid it from his parents.

We would stay at their house and have to leave the house, take a walk, take a drive, find excuses to get away from the people we were supposed to be spending time with so we could smoke. So, I mean, it was separating me from things that mattered to me, that I said mattered to me.

It was affecting my relationships at work. And I knew that it wasn't good for me. Of course, I knew. But when I grew up, it was very common. It was very socially accepted. I'm glad that that's changed quite a bit.

But the thing that got me was the, “This is going to kill me.” I really had a panicked moment. And then I can remember not long after that, this train of circumstances happened.

I feel like my subconscious mind was like, "You got to get done with this. You've just got to find a way to get done with this." And so your brain's a computer. And it started gently nudging me towards things.

And I ended up New Year's Day with a bunch of people. And one of my friends said, "Oh, come back to my house. I'm throwing up brunch for my mom.” She had just moved to town. And I was seated next to his wife who was a behavioral psychologist.

And I said, "Oh no." And she said, "What?" I said, "Well, here's the thing. I always knew that if I ever asked you how to quit smoking, I would end up quitting and I'm really ready to quit. So, help me. How can I quit smoking?"

And I quit February 2nd, Groundhog Day, which is a perfect way to describe my smoking. I wanted to quit, but I couldn't put it down. It was just endless Groundhog Day, right? And so, I quit only a month after having this conversation with her.


Jessi:

Wow.


Jeannie:

Which was awesome.


Jessi:

So, what do you think the difference was? Did you have more confidence from having a strategy?


Jeannie:

Well, I had gotten single.


Jessi:

Okay.


Jeannie:

So, that made it easier for sure. But I had still smoked for a couple years after the divorce.

But I think it was just I was done. I mean, it was not a half-hearted promise or commitment or “I'll try.” It was like, “I need to be done.”

I mean, I hated everything about it. It was in my hair, in my clothes. Everything was just drenched in smoke. And I was the kind of smoker I smoked in my house until the day I quit. And it was not attractive. Looking back, it's like, “Well, I can't believe I hung on as long as I did.”

And she gave me some resources. And then once she gave me some resources, I sought out some additional resources. The quitting picked up speed really quickly.

She told me to write down every day, get out a notebook. I had a notebook kind of like this I keep for ideas. And one, I woke up, what was the level of craving? It was a 10. Two, cup of coffee. And I had to write the time of day. And then, it was my second cigarette of the day, so the craving was like at a five. And I had to keep track of it.

And I'm a little competitive. So, in trying to keep track of it, I was like, "I'm not writing down 20 cigarettes." Because I was almost straight up a pack a day. I wasn't going to turn in my homework with 20 cigarettes for every day that week because we'd made an agreement to meet a week later.

So, by the end of the week, I was at 10. And she said, "Wow, that's pretty impressive. Do you think you can drop it to 8 next week?" And I'm like, "Yeah, I can do that. Eight a day. I can do that." And so, I did that.

And then the next week was six. The next week was four. I really was the most cranky dropping from 20 to 10. The big drop, that was like the quitting. When I got to four, she was like, "Maybe we'll just cut one a week for a while."

And I had done some reading. There's a resource. I can send it to you. It's whyquit.com and it has stories of people about their smoking journeys. It talked about some things like how to torture a smoker. Make them cut back one every day and when they get to zero, wait 3 days and say, "Oh, you can have just one." And it keeps you an active addiction.


Jessi:

Yeah.


Jeannie:

And that your neurotransmitters, I was told this… this gave me hope, right? It had a timeline on the website of in 12 hours this happens, in 4 hours this happens. And I hung on to that like it was money. Because it just gave me the hope that my blood pressure's come down.

And I remember when I hit 10 years and it was like your risk of stroke is now equal to that of a non-smoker. And it was like, “Woohoo!” It was a big deal. So those kinds of things encouraged me.

But when I was at four cigarettes, I go back and she said, "Can you pick a day that means something to you and schedule that to quit?" And like the next birthday, anniversary, anything I had was like 4 months away.

And I said, "Groundhog Day." I said, "Because that's what this is like." And so that's why I picked the date because I said, "This is waking up every day doing the same thing, thinking things will be different, and they're not."

So I was super psyched. We set the date and I think I was less cranky then than I was for that first week when I dropped from 20 to 10. At least my friends reflected that back to me.

And I had made plans to wash all my linens, take down my drapes. So I kept myself busy with the cleaning and the purging. I was down to like one ashtray, one lighter. I measured out everything. I'm a little neurotic, but I like systems. It made me feel safe and secure. Guardrails.


Jessi:

It sounds like a ritual which can be very healing.


Jeannie:

Well, and that was one of the things when I quit smoking, somebody said something to me and it hit me like a ton of bricks. I wonder if you can relate to this.

I noticed that when I had conversations with people, I was more engaged with them. And they said, "The reason that is, is because if you think about it, when you smoke, you're literally putting a smoke screen between you and another person. You're keeping distance. It's almost like a wall. It becomes like a protection."


Jessi:

Yeah.


Jeannie:

I used it to mark time. "Oh, I'll have a cigarette and then I'll do that." Or if I was in the middle of something that I didn't want to do, "I need a break to take a cigarette." It ran my life around the clock.


Jessi:

I feel similar, if I have this correct. Was it something that you kind of disliked the majority of your time smoking?


Jeannie:

I mean, I didn't like that. I'll tell you what, the thing I like most about me is that I'm a non-smoker. That's one of the top three things that I like about myself, I don't smoke. And I know in this day and age it's not a big deal not to smoke. But I hung on to that like a security blanket for so long.

I knew that the world was getting disgusted with me and smoking. My bosses made comments like I was of lower moral character or weak willed or whatever.

And I've heard it's tougher than kicking heroin. I don't know but it's a highly addictive substance. It had me and I was disgusted with myself. So, like it was a huge boost in self-esteem to be a non-smoker.


Jessi:

Absolutely. It's incredible. Like I had no idea that that would probably be the greatest gain for me was that self-esteem. I didn't want to lose it. That kept me going with it even when it got hard because...


Jeannie:

Oh, one hundred percent.


Jessi:

Just feeling good about yourself when you wake up. But yeah, I think it's so wild because a lot of people I talk to, they really can put smoking on a pedestal. They're like, "It was so great." They go into the aesthetics of it and all this like romanticization of it.

And I just didn't feel that way as a smoker. I was like, "I just have to do this. This is just something I have to do. Like I don’t want to be doing this."


Jeannie:

I loved your story about the girl who invited you to play tennis. Like that's such a powerful moment when things like that come up. Because when somebody offers to be helpful and you turn it down because you're in the grips of a fatal addiction, right? I mean, I could feel you being disgusted by that. And I could relate so well to just feeling horrible.

And I even did things to try and make smoking cool. I had crystal ashtrays. I bought a nice Colibri lighter because I wanted to bring back the cool to it. There was no way. There was no way.


Jessi:

So, I know it's kind of a reach back, but I am curious about those times that you had unsuccessfully tried to quit. You mentioned the patches you used.


Jeannie:

Yeah.


Jessi:

Do you remember what brought you back? What was it that you were looking to the smoking for?


Jeannie:

I'm going to say emotional support. I mean, I hate to admit this because I consider myself fairly strong willed, but I want to say it was one hundred percent a bad day crutch.

Something went really wrong. I was in a place where there was someone who had a cigarette and I was like, "Can I bum one of those?" And off to the races. And it was kind of soul crushing.


Jessi:

I'm curious to look at that a little bit more if you don't mind. Like do you think maybe that was just like a drive to self-harm?

Because I've talked about this before with someone else that like when you go back to it it doesn't feel good. Like you think in your mind "I want the pleasure. I want the relief." And then you do it and you're like "This is awful." But you still keep making yourself do it. What was going on there for you with that feeling?


Jeannie:

I would say like we discussed about the positive self-esteem effects.


Jessi:

Yeah.


Jeannie:

I would say that if somebody were to look at it the psychology of when I went back to smoking… at one time it was after a huge breakup. And one time it was after another big setback. And one time I think with the Chantix, I just really had a bad reaction to that so I wasn't really free of it.

But when I went back to it after the breakup, I lived in New York City. It's funny too because there wasn't a ton of smoking there. But I guess somebody pointed this out once if I were to look at it from the outside.

I think I was treating myself the way I felt I would deserve to be treated. Like "I'm not worth it." I really think it was tied up with "Who cares anyways?" And so I don't know if it was specifically self-harm, but it was definitely I was not taking any kind of good loving care of myself. I really wasn't. I was throwing myself straight under the bus and I knew it.


Jessi at midroll:

We will get back to the conversation in just a moment.

If you are listening to these stories and feeling like your own journey is stuck in a loop of broken promises, please know that you do not have to do this alone. I currently have some spots available for one-on-one coaching.

I work with people to help them move out of the cycle of smoking and into a life where they finally feel in control. We use a heart-led framework to address the deeper patterns so your success is actually sustainable.

If you are ready to commit to the work, apply now at honoryourheart.net/application. I would love to support you on your way to reconnecting to yourself and moving past smoking. Now, back to the story.


Jessi:

Absolutely can relate to that feeling, one hundred percent. Yeah, it's a difficult pattern to shift out of.

So, what do you do now when you have low days? Do you still have low days like that? What do you do to care for yourself and then to kind of rebound from that?


Jeannie:

I do. And I'll tell you what, I quit 2 years after my divorce. And my divorce was really traumatic. My life became very different from one day to the next. So I was starting over from scratch feeling pretty low.

Quitting smoking was one of the things that helped me feel like I was climbing out of the hole. Like it was a tangible sign that I was taking care of myself. And I continued on that.

I did a lot of work with a coach and looked at a lot of the things I'm sharing with you as reflections. I didn't know them at the time. I only know it in retrospect because I've done a lot of, as the kids say, the shadow work.

And she was the one who pointed out to me, "You know, I think you're using cigarettes to treat yourself the way you feel you deserve to be treated." And that really didn't sit well with me.

And then I remember saying, "Should I quit now?" And she said, "I think you're a little fragile right now. Why don't you get your legs under you a bit before you do that? I don't want things to get dangerously bad for you. Like right now, smoking is a crutch, right? It's helping you."

And then I remember when she said, "Okay, whenever you're ready." As soon as that happened, like boom, boom, boom, the dominoes fell in place pretty quickly.

So now what do I do? I garden. I do a ton of things that are outdoors. I do a ton of things that are with people. I'm much more engaged with people, my community. I can spend periods of time inside where it would have been murder after an hour or two.

I have one friend who smokes and we can't sit and have a conversation for too long. She's got to "Do you mind if I get up and go outside for a little while." I am not going to tell her what to do, but I encourage her if she's ever ready to talk to me. Because it's heartbreaking for me, right? It really is. It's like "Ugh, I know how this ends. It's not good."


Jessi:

Yeah. It's easier to see from the outside, certainly. But when it's you, it's like, "Oh, who cares about me?" [laughter]


Jeannie:

Yeah. I mean, the delusion of, "I think I make this look good." No, no, it doesn't look good on anybody. I see people smoke in a movie now and I think "Ugh, what are you thinking? What are you doing?"

I'm not one of those reformed smokers that is judgmental towards it. It's more empathy. It's more like, "Oh, I wish I could help." Well, look at what you do. You're so devoted to it.

And I have two women that called me out of the blue because my friend said, "My friend Jeannie quit smoking. She can help you." And they both quit. And I have their anniversaries on my calendar and I text them, "Congratulations, another year smoke free." And they always say, "You know, I can't believe I waited so long. Thanks so much." Just those two people.

And I will say I had a daughter that smoked and the happiest I've ever been for her is when she quit. And she is the happiest she's ever been. She also didn't realize what it was taking away from her, robbing from her.

Like everything I do in my life that is joyful would have been affected, interrupted in some way. I would have not been able to… like I can spend days in a museum. And I couldn't have done that when I smoked. Too many hours. You got to get out, got to get a cigarette.


Jessi:

Yeah, the freedom and the focus. And I'm interested in what you said. I thought that was pretty profound when you were talking about the damage or the disconnection that you have with other people when you're a smoker.

And I'm curious what you think that is about? Because the way I see it is like you're emotionally numbing with the smoking so you're not feeling as deeply. And then also you have that distracted mind that's always like "When can I get my next one? How long has it been?"


Jeannie:

Yeah, it's a constant.


Jessi:

What do you think changed with your connection piece? Why is it so much easier to connect with people now?


Jeannie:

It's so much better too. And I belong to like this one community group and there's a place where the smokers go afterwards. And years ago I would be out in the place where the smokers go.


And a friend of mine joked, "Oh, look at the smokers. They're all having fun. You know, they all get together and get to smoke." I said, "Those people are bonded by their like depressing, soul sucking…"


Jessi:

The pain, yeah.


Jeannie:

I feel nothing but empathy. Like I feel so bad for them that they have to do that.

And I have one woman that I helped quit right after I quit. I was like, "You can do this." She was a good friend. And she quit successfully.

And then she started dating a guy who vaped and she went right back to it. And it was just... And I think she still does. I don't know. We're not friends because I'll tell you, smoking will choose your friends, too.


Jessi:

Yeah.


Jeannie:

Like smokers hang out with other smokers. So my world got bigger. So much bigger. I didn't have the ability to connect. I loved when somebody pointed out that it was a smoke screen and I was... You said numbing. Great word.

I think I was separating myself from people. It was a way to not let people get close to me. Like literally putting up a wall. Maybe I didn't trust myself. Maybe I didn't trust them. I'm sure I was a more fearful person than I am today.

I'm sure I probably shrunk from life if I were to be honest in a way that I didn't even realize I was doing at the time. It kept my world smaller. Ugh, I shiver when I think about that I'd be sitting in an armchair smoking away in front of the TV on my dying days. Like no, no, no.

And I know my health has improved. I did gain weight and I let myself gain weight because that's temporary. But lung damage is for life. But then my lifestyle got so much more active and outgoing, it all sorted itself out.


Jessi:

Yeah. Yeah. Give yourself some grace for that temporary adjustment. It's such a huge change.


Jeannie:

It is. Everything changes. I mean, the people that I used to hang out in the group and smoke with, I had to remove myself from that. And I can honestly say a lot of them have probably quit over time, but I never looked back from that. I just didn't want to be around it.

I'm not intolerant of smoking. I don't lecture or preach. But if people ever inquire, I'll say, "Well, I used to smoke and it was just killing me." And it wasn't good emotionally either.


Jessi:

Speaking of that, when you find yourself in situations like… I'm not sure who quit first, you or your daughter, or being around friends. Do you ever have cravings to smoke when someone smokes?

Well, we just talked about it actually. We talked about the movies, how you feel.


Jeannie:

Once in a great while. I quit before my daughter and I did kind of nudge her a little bit because I just said, "Look, you do what you want to do. But I'm here for you if you ever want to quit because it is literally the best thing I've ever done for myself."


Jessi:

Yeah.


Jeannie:

Hands down. It's one of the things I'm most proud of, most happy about. Like, if I could put it on my resume, I would, “Happy, joyful non-smoker, free at last.”

But when I'm once in a blue moon, I'll be outside and there'll be somebody smoking and I'll get that old familiar scent. And for one second, my brain remembers. But it just lasts one second.

And then ugh, I had this experience. I think it was since we connected. I was somewhere walking out of a building and somebody was smoking and it came right at me and I was like, "Ugh, this is unacceptable, not okay."

So, most of the time it's kind of repugnant. But I'm not mean to the people. I just roll with it because I know I couldn't have felt worse about it. No one could have made me feel worse.


Jessi:

Right.


Jeannie:

Right. I was feeling pretty low about it. And then it would close the door to them ever asking me how I quit if I was not kind.


Jessi:

Of course. Yeah. I just think it's nice to paint that picture for someone that's having a hard time imagining being around it, not wanting it, living without cravings. Because my cravings are also very, very rare. Some people have them more often. But


Jeannie:

Yeah, for some people, they really stick around.


Jessi:

It's totally possible to just not even think about it until you get hit in the face with that smell and then most of you is like, "No, thanks. I used to do that."


Jeannie:

Never, it almost never crosses my mind. And I do share with people if they're smoking and they don't look excited to be smoking in particular. I'll say, "You know, you can kick that. It's the best thing you could ever do for yourself." I try to be encouraging.


Jessi:

No, it's great to hear stories. That's why I do the podcast. I think that's really kind of what opened my mind to even the possibility. I was like, "Oh, you can quit. People do that."


Jeannie:

And that website that I went to, it's so outdated. It's very 1950’s. But it had people's stories to say like "I don't judge you. I was you and I know there's something better for you and it's not just not smoking and it's not just breathing better. Your world will expand in a way I can't even explain."


Jessi:

Right. It's a whole new phase of life.


Jeannie:

Yeah. Freedom.


Jessi:

Yes. And I want to talk more about the connection piece. The connection to yourself. So we talked about connections to others. What's changed with your connection to yourself? Do you feel like you have a deeper awareness of your needs, of your feelings? How does it affect your intuition, your creativity in any way, quitting smoking?


Jeannie:

When I walked up those stairs, it one of the first times where I really listened to my body and respected what it had to say to me. And since then, I've probably expanded that practice quite a bit because I think esteem myself more. I value myself more. I want to take care of myself. And quitting smoking was a huge tangible evidence of that. So then I just kept going.

It's one of those things like personal growth. If you do a little thing that feels amazing or you do something like quitting smoking, it feels amazing. And you're like, "What next?"

I feel very in tune with my physical body, very in tune with my emotional body right now. Like I have a deep contentment and an okayness that I haven't... And it gets better the more you stay in it and pay attention. And I still do think I take classes on things that interest me and I've given myself permission to do that, invest in myself.


Jessi:

Amazing. So, let's talk to somebody that's in it right now. You've had friends, you've had people that you know and that you've encouraged. How can you encourage someone that's really just lost that connection to themselves?

They don't know what they want. They don't know what they need. They don't know how to care for themselves in any way other than smoking. Smoking has like become their self-care.


Jeannie:

Yeah. The only thing they have left...


Jessi:

Yeah. It’s the comfort.


Jeannie:

Yeah. Well, the soothing and the comfort of smoking. Oh my gosh. I’m totally thinking of a person right now I know that gets huddled up with a pack of cigarettes and probably deeply unhappy with themselves in the world. At least at the time I'm imagining them.

And I mean the only thing I could say is like you are not alone. There's tons of people who have been where you are. There's hope. There's help. There's a better life waiting for you. You don't have to do any of it alone ever. You know, there's tons of support out there. People will be cheering you on.

You know, going through it might be a little rough, but it's character building. And when you get to the other side of it, you will be so proud of what you accomplished and it will just get better and better. But mostly, you're not alone. There's hope and there's help. And people genuinely want you to be in a better place. It's heartbreaking to see anybody in that position.


Jessi:

Yeah, we all benefit when you're you.


Jeannie:

Yeah.


Jessi:

I don't know how it works, but it really does. It ripples out more than you think.I think it's great advice. It's beautiful.

So, talk to us more about your work, about your podcast. Where people can find you? I loved your podcast. I thought it was really inspiring and made me think more deeply about some of the issues I'm going through. I'm still learning, you know. I quit smoking but here's still more work to do, more healing.


Jeannie:

There's always more work to do. Oh yeah, it's a lifelong process. But as long as you're in it, as long as you're working at it and taking the next step.

The podcast is unfolding in a way I completely had not imagined it to. I help women coming out of like really tragic situations, rebuild their financial lives as a volunteer work. And somebody said you could reach more people if you had a podcast. I thought it was going to be all about tips to rebuild credit and money.

And instead it feels like this emotional spiritual journey. It relates back to the smoking and how do I bring the best version of myself to the world and how do I make it better? How do I heal from all the things, the perceived harms instead of dragging them around? Because they're just weighing me down.

So I launched the podcast Growing Up Late. I have a website. I'm going to be starting a newsletter. I've got a YouTube channel. Did I send you my linktree that it has everything? The YouTube, the podcast, it has all the things.


Jessi:

Yes, I'll have that in the show notes.


Jeannie:

Okay, great. Everything's under either my name, Jeannie McIntire, or Growing Up Late.

And I really appreciate your passion and what you're doing. It was like so aligned when I was communicating with you. At first, I didn't even realize what I was doing. I was stumbling along trying to figure things out. And I really feel like it was a perfect connection because as soon as I saw what you were doing, I'm like, "We're headed the same way."


Jessi:

I feel it too.


Jeannie:

Yeah, we're headed the same way. I was like, "This is perfect." I didn't know what I was doing and you were exactly one of the people that I'm really grateful to connect with.


Jessi:

Absolutely. Like I said, you've inspired me. You made me really see like, "Oh, I got some stuff to think about here." Like I said, it's a long road, but I'm happy to do it.


Jeannie:

Me, too. That's one of the things I love about it, though, is that I think if it was a journey that had a destination, I'd be looking to check off boxes. But instead, you kind of get to enjoy the ride. You get periods where you're doing some heavy lifting and clearing out the garbage. And then there's other periods where you just are chill and you float for a little bit.

And I took a class at the end of the year and it's like the phrase for my year. You picked out 12 things and every day you burned one. And the one you were left with was your like motto for the year and it was "my life's purpose is going to unfold with ease this year."


Jessi:

Love that.


Jeannie:

Yeah. And it kind of is like meeting you, the connections I've made, the things that have transpired since then, it's all way beyond anything I could have figured out on my own.


Jessi:

When you leave a space and you don't plan too much, like things could come up. That's one of the things I struggle with too is the planning, the overthinking, all that stuff that was part of my smoking cycle is still with me.

And instead of hating it and trying to get rid of it and trying just wishing it would go away, I'm trying to embrace it more. And be like, "Okay," but still have separation. And it's a balancing act. It's like, "Okay, this has been part of my pattern. I accept this, but I don't have to let this define who I am."

So, I think your work goes to speak to all that. It's about major transformation because we go through it again and again in all phases of life.


Jeannie:

And you can take that. Like for me is the neurosis of scheduling my smoking and all that. I can take that and apply it in a positive way to something I want to accomplish now.


Jessi:

Yeah.


Jeannie:

So, you know, like scheduling your podcast and getting your guests lined out and sending questions. The skills we learned in survival mode, we can transform into something that's like blossoming mode.


Jessi:

Yes. Turn it around. Just so powerful.

Thank you so much for coming on here, for sharing your story with us and being vulnerable, talking about the way you were feeling your self-worth. It's not easy to go there, but it really is meaningful connecting.

Because like we were talking about with stories, people see themselves. It hits the heart in a way that being perfect, having it all figured out, just can't. So, I'm glad that you've learned a lot, of course, and you're in this great spot, but thanks for sharing those hardships with us, too.


Jeannie:

Oh, I would have loved to have a podcast like this around when I was at the end of my smoking. It would have been like a lifeline. So, I'm so grateful that you do this.


Jessi:

I love it. Well, thanks again and take care everyone. We'll see you next week.


End of Interview

Jeannie’s story shows us how quitting smoking can lead to incredible renewal, bringing true contentment, joy, and excitement back into our lives. She also shared how smoking can isolate us from meaningful connection with others and our own genuine needs.

Jenessa too felt weighed down by smoking and a self-destructive lifestyle for many years, stuck in an unhappy place with a heavy amount of guilt around the habit.

Inspired to open herself back up to connection, Jenessa stepped outside of her comfort zone and completely transformed her life. Listen to her full story on Episode 46 of You Can Quit Smoking.